Do More of What Works and Less of What Doesn’t

"Doctor, doctor, you've got to help me. Every time I bang my head against the wall, it hurts."

"Well, stop banging your head against the wall!"

Why do some people make life unnecessarily complex? It doesn't require a PhD to get the most enjoyment from life; all that's needed is a little common sense. If it hurts when you bang your head against the wall, stop banging it! If what you're doing causes physical or mental pain, stop doing it.

We come equipped with a built-in sensor called pain. Whenever we're experiencing it, it's telling us we're doing something wrong. Yet, rather than heed the warning, we often continue doing what's wrong and then complain about the pain. Does that make any sense? Of course not. What does make sense, however, is to do more of what works and less of what doesn't. Simple, isn't it? It's just a matter of doing what makes us feel proud and avoiding what makes us feel ashamed.

If it's so simple, why do so many of us end up regretting what we do and neglect to do? Here's a quick review of a handful of reasons why we keep banging our heads against the wall, despite the pain.

1. HABITS. Habits are automatic responses. We repeat them without thinking. Good habits are powerful friends. Bad habits can lead to ruination. So, resolve today to start replacing bad habits with good ones.
2. EMOTIONS (feelings). Emotions are like habits; they can act as an ally or an enemy. Emotions are what motivate us to act. And our actions will either lead to pleasant results or nasty consequences. So, it's important to become AWARE of our feelings and where they will lead us. In other words, we need to stop and think before we act.
3. BELIEFS. We are governed by our beliefs. If you believe you cannot do something, you cannot. If you believe you can, you can. Beliefs are in our subconscious. Most of them were implanted during our childhood and youth. You may consciously want to succeed, for example, but if you believe you are undeserving of success, your subconscious will see to it that you get what you deserve (failure).
4. FEAR. Many allow themselves to become trapped by fear. It may be fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of giving up pleasure for hard work, or other fears. The antidote to fear is to do the very thing we fear by living courageously. We need to constantly step out of our comfort zone. Fear is a wonderful emotion, for it is the price we pay to experience exhilaration and joy, which are the rewards for doing what we fear.
5. VICTIMHOOD. This is a pernicious state in which some people delude themselves into believing they are powerless to change. To comfort themselves, they blame life or others for their problems. The way out is to accept personal responsibility. The pain they're in is a signal that THEY are doing something wrong; they need to stop looking for excuses and start looking for solutions.