Growing Old

Written by Chuck Gallozzi   

The advantage of being old is that I can sing while I brush my teeth

Do you suffer from gerontophobia, which is the fear of old people, old age, and growing old? Judging by the number of books dealing with life after 50, or even 40, it appears that many people have difficulty dealing with aging. Since I’m 65, I have the right to ask, “What’s all the fuss about?”

Part of the problem, it seems to me, is how we interpret the meaning of ‘OLD.’ In the minds of many, the word means decrepit, in shambles, falling apart, broken down, or worn out. If that’s what we think, it’s hardly surprising that we grow anxious at the thought of growing old. But when we look at AGE-ING as SAGE-ING, life takes on a whole new twist. So, you see, we’re not growing old; we’re growing wise. That’s why Winston Churchill (1874 ~ 1965), said, “The young sow wild oats. The old grow sage.”

When we were young twits, not knowing any better, we were wise guys, but as we grow in years, gain experience, and learn from our mistakes, we become wise men and women. That’s not something to be fearful of, but something to look forward to. We’re not growing old; we’re unfolding, blossoming, and developing our potential. When we realize this, we will find that aging is not enraging, but engaging. Attitude is everything, for as George Burns (1896 ~ 1996) said, “You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.”

Ironically, fear of old age ages one and fear of death hastens death, so they’re good reasons for changing our attitude. Since we have limited resources, shouldn’t we be using them wisely? Our most precious resource is time, which is synonymous with life. If I spend time complaining about growing old, isn’t that a misallocation of my limited resources? Isn’t time spent unhappily, time misspent? The secret of life is not about enjoying the present moment, but about enjoying EVERY moment. This is not an exaggeration, for even on the way to the funeral of one’s spouse, there is time to enjoy the fragrance of flowers, time to rejoice in the memories of the many happy moments spent together, and time to welcome the consolation of friends.

But isn’t it true that as we age our body deteriorates? So? Look, there are advantages and disadvantages in all stages of life. True, young people can outrun me, but I can outthink them. It’s just a matter of substituting one advantage for another. Why would I want to moan about the disadvantages when I could be enjoying the advantages? However, if you are concerned about your body crumbling in the future, do something about it today. Join a fitness club or exercise. That will stop your complaining, make you feel good, and greatly enhance your future wellbeing. So, stop griping about middle age; after all, you’ll grow out of it!

In some, the onset of old age kindles the fear of death. But the temporal nature of life is what makes it precious and enjoyable. We love summer, fall, winter, and spring because they will end. I look forward to tonight’s Christmas banquet because it comes but once a year. Life is a banquet that comes once in a lifetime. We are all attending that banquet. What will we do about it? Enjoy it? Or bemoan the fact that it will end? We can never enjoy all there is in one lifetime, so why miss out on more by wasting time being fearful?